Author: Naomi Grobler

Is it just me or are you also feeling a bit overwhelmed by all the negative press, the sad truths, the horrible crimes, the uncertainty of the whole world around us? There is not a day that goes by without seeing the shocking rise of covid numbers, the inconceivable crimes against the most vulnerable, the never ending reporting on yet another corruption scandal; in the news, social media or even hearing it from people sitting next to you….well 1.5m away…. When last did you have a conversation with a friend or loved one about just positive news, feel good stories or conversations fueled with encouragement? Don’t you think it’s time to loadshed some of that negativity….having set times where no negative thoughts and words are allowed….only the good ones, the endorphin feeding ones?

We dread that alert- Load shedding scheduled,  but we deal with it – we charge the lights, fuel up the generators, prepare food in advance, and even take the time to talk to each other because there is no technologically distractions. We are given schedule of times when loadshedding is set to take place in our area, we prepare and live accordingly….why can’t we do that emotionally? Why can’t we schedule time to load shed all the negative emotions for a certain period of time? Time that no negativity is permitted, or rather no negativity is available….only the much needed positive influence to ourselves and those around us.

We allow negative influences to overtake our perception of everything, to ruin the most wonderful sceneries, precious moments, never-to-be repeated memories and time with loved ones. Human beings tend to conform to set out rules and schedules, because we understand that it is suppose to be for the benefit of the greater good….like loadshedding is suppose the lighten the load on energy usage, we live with the set out schedules. Why don’t we set up our own emotional loadshedding schedules, time set out to benefit, build-up, inspire, motivate, believe, hope and love in! We at the very least owe that to ourselves to be more positive, because we can only share that of which we have overflowing…. come on, set that time, be that one, be the difference! We cannot control all the bad in this world, we are not naive to all the negative press or even loadshedding which will happen again, but we can choose when and how we are going to participate in it, and how our positive mindset might give bright shining rays of hope in the darkness of negativity.

Loadshedding negativity in progress…hope to see you there!

Yours truly
Naomi Grobler

“And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise.
Philippians 4:8″

When last, if ever, did you invite yourself to spend time with you? And by this I mean, making an effort,  doing something with extra flair and taking that time to make it special and meaningful….

How many invites have we send over the years to others, planning themes, preparing food with a twist, special favours for the guests and taking time to plan games etc. to make the event memorable! Why is it so much easier to do all this and more for others but not for ourselves?

Think about it….who do you invite? Usually its people you enjoy spending time with, who makes life a little more lighter and who you can just be yourself with. Well do you like spending time with yourself, do you feel light in who you are, do you hide from yourself…the true you? Creating inviting moments leads to a sense of being at peace with your own company, that absolute deep breath of contentment. Being kind to yourself on purpose. It’s not about having time but making time to invite yourself to special “events”. Make a special fancy meal just for you, wine and dine with your own company, go drink coffee alone and enjoy your thoughts as your coffee date. Plan a weekend away just with your true self as companion. Dress up without reason and give yourself a compliment. Invite quiet peaceful moments as well….everything in life does not have to be firework moments….they can also be the pajama, ice-cream and movie nights, where you can cry the ugly cry and laugh until you snort, without feeling ashamed and apologizing for being plain and boring….. plan with meaning to invite and create moments, events, dates with you as guest.

Inviting yourself to the expectations of replenishment, safety, excitement, security and peace holds so much potential. It is here where clarity can be achieved and space created for emotional, spiritual and mental growth. Being a good companion to yourself, you are complimenting the One who created you to be the true version of you. Being at peace with yourself you are not only inviting you to your dinner table but you truly have space for the Guest of Honor… the One who loves and cherish you just as you are, and who wants you to make time for yourself, because in that space…the quiet, alone, wonderful and thoughtfully created times….thats where there is truly space to experience the fulness of Him.

Invite yourself, make the time, create opportunity, have planned adventures and be okay as your own guest every now and then….you might just like your company more than you anticipated!

From one guest to another
Naomi

“Receive and experience the amazing grace of the Master, Jesus Christ, deep, deep within yourselves. Philippians 4:23 MSG”

Character can be defined as the mental and moral qualities distinctive to an individual. The group of qualities that make a person, group, or thing different from others, a distinguishing feature. HOW does your character look like, what does your habits, motives, thoughts and actions say about who you are? Particularly as it concerns with integrity – What are your values, views, actions and thoughts done in secret? How will you judge your character if you are an outsider rather than participant to it?

Character is much like the foundation of a house. You cannot see it with the eye once the house is built on it, but the quality, the height, the strength and the shape is deterred by the foundation, a.k.a the character. How does your foundation look like….is it formed out of hard learned lessons, mistakes corrected, long thought through decisions, how you dealt with crisis, tough times etc., or is it rushed, looks nice but carries no weight, shallow and bearly no strength. You see the strength of your foundation ultimately determines the quality of your house…..not how it looks like, but how it withstands the storms. Will your house start showing cracks after a while, because the pressure is just to much on your already poor foundation (character)? The reality is that your character can be patched to look nice and even inviting to those arround you….but the cracks and the mould eventually will catch up and then your character cannot hide it’s true nature.

One’s character show who you really are, and who you belong to. Who’s image are you portraying, who’s imprint can be seen on me?
Are you carrying around what the world thinks should be a “great character “, are you your one and only judge on the quality of your own character, or are you allowing and willing for the One who created you, to form, shape and polish your character…..who’s opinion matters most, who’s stamp of approval do you seek? You see when we accept that no one is perfect, we all have flaws and carries around scars, that’s when true self-reflection takes place. Rather than deafening our true self and putting on different masks in different circumstances, we should rather let our scars, flaws and hurt contribute to a character that will not only serve you but others as well! How you treat others says alot about who you are, and how much you allowed the hard learned lessons of life to impact you…for the greater good, for the strengthening of your foundation, even if it meant tearing down the house and restarting the build of your foundation back to its best version. Then the true rebuilding can start – a house that withstands all weather conditions, storms and hardship. Prepare enough room for The light to go through every part of it, so that all can see who made you and who you belong to! Be the exception to the rule…dont patch the house, rather fix the foundation and build a new, stronger, better you!

I just love this qoute:
“Your true character is most accurately measured by how you treat those who can do ‘Nothing’ for you. ” – Mother Teresa

Your “work-in-progress”, “watch-this-space”, “carrier-of-His-light”
Naomi

“Not only that, but we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope,”
Romans 5:3‭-‬4 ESV

What is the difference between these two strong statement words? Well “Lonely” is a feeling an effect of being alone, whereas “Alone” is a state of being, defining the exact condition. Which one defines you today…exactly there where you are reading this blog??? Are you alone or lonely?

Being alone is not necessarily a negative state of being, nor does it imply that the condition of being alone is linked with poor mental state and associates thereof…..you see it is in that state of being alone that true self-reflection is possible, where the mask can be taken off and the reflection of your true self can be seen or even searched for. We truly need to grasp the great role of what being alone plays in our emotional growth and self discovery. Yet so many of us are afraid of being alone and what that will mean for our self reflection, how we will feel about what we see and the difficulty of addressing those “reflections “…. Being alone, truly alone with only you as company every now and then, gives you the opportunity to just be you simply and honestly…. giving honest feedback to yourself about what is great and what is not so great…being your own best critic….in this alone state taking the opportunity to have a mental recharge day, were you are the primary provider of the emotional feedback you give your mind and either recycling, learning, holding on to, letting go off or researching the thoughts, feelings and actions you have. You see being alone can be the greatest investment you make in your mental wellbeing. Just like we plan to be social, we need to schedule alone time.

Now on the other side of the coin, lies loneliness…..where you feel secluded and confined in your own thoughts and feelings. You feel empty, as if nobody cares nor understands and you are not noticed in this strong sense of seperation from those around you….you can be lonely and surrounded by hundreds of people. Addressing loneliness can be a battle in itself… but I dare you to take the path of healing instead of avoidance. Identifying and taking on the issues that lead to feeling lonely, will start the domino effect of healing. Become part of a support group for fellow lonely agents, reaching out to a friend about how and why you feel the way you do, seeing a therapist, doing research on your current mental state. You will be amazed to see that infact you are not alone in your loneliness….reach out, or take the hand offered…there is such an amazing breakthrough waiting to take place!

Being alone should not be a burden but a celebrated part of your being. Our creator saw and guided us on the importance thereof. Loneliness on the other hand is not a set in stone mental state, but rather an opportunity to be your own personal archeologists in identifying the real treasure beyond all the rock and dust that loneliness has formed around you as protection of hurt and/or trauma.

Don’t feel alone in your loneliness, reach out there is support. Don’t be lonely in the state of being alone, it is time spent with not only you but who you want to be.

Regards from the alone time investor
Naomi

“Here’s what I want you to do: Find a quiet, secluded place so you won’t be tempted to role-play before God. Just be there as simply and honestly as you can manage. The focus will shift from you to God, and you will begin to sense his grace. Matthew 6:6

Fear of opinion tends to cripple and limit us in unimaginable ways. It restricts our ability to live out our fullest potential and be free of the chains thereof that holds us back from reaching and dreaming for more……. Do you often feel that you rely to much on the opinions of others and not your own? Are you limiting, restricting, crippling and even imprisoning yourself due to what others think or say???

You see we build a prison so heavily guarded by the words of others, we make building plans based on their thoughts and even appoint guards to notify us when someone is having an opinion and how we should react towards it!!!!! It’s your prison and you are the only one who can break down those walls and set the captive free…YOU! There is so much freedom when you trust what God has created in you, how unique and wonderfully made you are, how known you are by The Hand that has created you with so much love, care and thought!

Often opinion of others are based on their own insecurities and not on you, but it is so much easier to project rather than to do introspection…. And is exactly there where you should start. Start with introspection as in why others opinions have such a hold on you, why you allow the effect to be greater than the ignorance thereof and why you are fearing their opinion rather than redirecting it to opinions that can be listend to but not be allowed to take up space that belongs to the Only one who will never have a negative opinion of you…God! Surround yourself with people who’s opinion you do not fear but appreciate because the faith of few can change the minds of many.

How is your relationship with yourself because within that sprouts the personalized opinion you have of you and what opinions you allow to form you from the outside! Do you really love yourself, the beautiful wonderfully made human being you are??? Or do you compare and invest in the hated opinions of those you choose to listen to? Yes you heard correctly…you choose to adhere and give attention to whoever gives an opinion….choose wisely, choose with eyes wide opened and with introspection if you are going to internalize that opinion, fear it, burden yourself with it, or throw it like a rock into a lake that sinks and has no effect on the purpose and beauty of the lake!

His opinion of you is always greater and more beautiful, look into and pray that your ears will be able to hear His voice above all else, and surround yourself with people that create positive thought and beauty rather than fear.

With Regards

Warm positively affirmed opinions
Naomi

“The fear of human opinion disables; trusting in God protects you from that.”
Proverbs 29:25